DarthLukan

If you only knew what I was thinking right now, if you only knew what I have been thinking for sometime, of how I see the world at this hour of the night, of what it is that I hear when all else is silent, If you only knew what it took to hold it all together, of the pain that I feel every time that I hold back, of the fatigue that sets in, clouding every thought but the ones that matter, If you only knew what it was like to feel this trapped, after having been so free for so long, after having been who I was, If you only knew how much I want to give up, the peace that comes, the calm that settles in, If you only knew how helples

Our lives we pack into boxes of hardened paper, like little pieces to so many puzzles all mixed up. They all go away. Hopes and dreams, laughter and screams, love and hate all reverberating within these walls. All gone away. Everything we are, everything that we wanted to be we load up to meet us there. Everything goes away. How long will we not be whole?  How long until our souls find us again? How long away? It's only twenty-four hours, but it feels like a lifetime. So very far away. When we arrive and start over anew, will we ever be the same? Or will we have to again move away?

As the embers slowly fade, And I am left panting in the dark, The fires are quelled within me, The silence rings in my ears, My blood stops running, My heart is a whisper in my chest, The thoughts are not so scattered, They exist not in this consciousness, The wall stands between me and what’s inside, I am a shell, a golem incapable of feeling, Emptiness surrounds me like the bitter chill of winter, I am faced with that which is most void of life, I stand though my knees shake beneath me, The ground feels like hot clay, My feet slide from under me and I fall into nothingness, I am weightless and heavy all at the same tim

Dark Angels and Light Demons Book I: Ghosts of the Past Part I: Ashes to Ashes... Chapter II: A Knock at the Door 30 Hours later, 0530Hrs Zulu FOB Dark Horse, the “Green Zone”, Baghdad Iraq The inner compound was the noisiest silent operation that could have ever existed.  There wasn’t a calm corner within the confines of the high concrete barriers that separated the headquarters buildings from the rest of the small base.  Lukan compared the scene to a beehive.  He picked up his SAT Phone and spoke into the receiver, “Big Brother.”  He said, his voice even and collected despite the twenty-two hour flight as wel

Today Is... A day to remember, A day to forget, The first day of your life, The day that you die, Today is... Turning round and round, Sleeping safe and sound, Cold and arduous, Warm and prosperous, Today is... Filled with music, Empty in stone silence, Light as the breeze, Sharp as a sneeze, Today is... A newborn's first breath, An old mans' death, A lover's embrace, The bitter's distast, Today is... Complexity in thought and process, Simplicity in the little we posess, Equal in opposition, Random in composition, Today is... Blessed to the skies, Cursed to the eyes, Luminated by the lights, Blackened by your lies

All consuming hate and disgust, this dark love is truly just The Shadow's lust, I think of you and your blackened lips, I think of your naked and milky white hips, the blood tastes like suicide, this life is nothing but a lie, my eyes have seen through the gate, but all I see now is the deep burning hate, I fuck you but not for love, I'm taunting those celestial beings above, every stroke like a middle finger jabbed in their faces, by this act I further disgrace us, I've tasted the death that awaits me between those thighs, I've dreamed so often of cutting out those pretty eyes, I do it all hoping that I will die, it some sick

Death of Innocence     I remember that day so vividly, as if it was yesterday.  The clouds were a deep gray and the wind was just starting to take on the bitter cold that always preceded the winter.  I was only nine, still too young to fully understand the war that others would later refer to as "World War II".  At first my mother said that I had to be careful when I would play outside.  "Inessa, stay close, you don't know when trouble will find you."  She'd say.  After a short while, I was not allowed to play outside by myself.        Then there were the gunshots.  The loud crack and reports repeating incessantly through the air.  Mother